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On Getting Reacquainted With My Soul

When I first met him, my soul leapt around like an excited puppy. 
I don’t know why. 
If I’d have known then what he’d end up doing to me, I would have been repulsed by him. But danger can be cunning and can’t always be sensed in advance, and of course I was beyond naive. So trusting. So ready to be loved and seen, and he seduced so masterfully. I didn’t know he was only hungry for taking. I didn’t know people like him actually existed.
Sometimes I wonder if my soul confused him for someone else. Maybe he was the garden path, and in my eager innocence I couldn’t tell the difference.
Almost immediately, my intuition started sending me loud messages, but I didn’t know what an intuition was, let alone how to listen to it. I can remember so many times feeling something within me crying out in protest, begging to be heeded. 
Now I understand that was my true self, desperately trying to get me safe. 
If only I’d known her voice. 
I froze instead - my body’s response to the trauma. If I was frozen,…

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